17 May 2012

Dog {vs} Bug

My dog jumps up on my lap and curls up in a ball in the recliner. 
His dog hits you in the head with her tail.
My dog sleeps on the bed. 
His dog prefers to sleep on the concrete slab in the garage. 
My dog catches treats. 
His dog cowers from them. 
My dog is pristine - always keeping herself clean. She cowers next to the door to come in out of the rain.
His dog is a ball of slobber and the shade of southern clay (man I hate that stuff).
My dog has minimal and easily controlled fur. 
His dog sheds enough to make wigs for every balding man in our county (and that is saying something).

My dog could care less about what happens outside.
His dog barks at 5am when the trash truck enters the neighborhood.

My dog is a perfect little angel (aside from the fact she has a nasty habit of eating sippy cups and pacifiers).
His dog is an idiot (who also has a chewing habit, but it usually involves wood)!

And before you think they are one in the same, we actually do have two dogs. Don't get me wrong, I love both of them very much. I don't mind the brushing, cleaning, vacuuming, nail trimming, etc because I love dogs. But, his dog is by far the dumber of the species in our house.

His dog, Zoeller, is an 80 lb Great Pyranees. A beautiful dog, looking somewhat like a polar bear (well, when she is clean anyway). She is great with the kids, she has a massive bark and scares people who walk up to the door (no complaints on that one). But I can't get past the fact she is stupid, just flat out stupid.

The dog has paws the size of luncheon plates. Her head is practically as big as mine, and just reaches over the top of the kitchen table (not pleasant). She has a tail that can bring on an avalanche.

So yesterday, when there was a stink bug crawling along the kitchen floor, the dog got up and ran. That's right - R-A-N! Tail between the legs, scampering across the kitchen floor to hide behind the curtain. Really?! I've seen her sniff bugs up her nose to never see them again. A stink bug is about 3/4" long, roughly the same size as one of her nostrils. Yet here she was deathly afraid of the thing. She is lucky she is pretty, cause I'm pretty sure I would have traded her in - especially one of the times she managed to escape from the fence.

So today's layout is about Zoeller. Its a digital page for the ADSR, challenge #4. I'm having lots of fun doing these, but they are going really fast! I'm kinda shocked it is half over already.

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